Sometimes, live just feels like one big toilet of crap. And that's kind of how mine has felt lately. The nightmares are more frequent, the sleep is less and less, the meds are making me sick beyond belief and sometimes the only comfort is my fiance and my dog. Oh, and the PS3.
The soon-to-be in laws are driving me up the f-ing wall, almost literally. I'm crazy, I'm unreliable, I have a weird fungus on my feet (I'm not sure if they know this, but I bet they've said it once or twice)....you name it, and this family has probably said it about me.....but none of it TO me (well, to either of us for that matter) But they're all HAPPY to sit there and smile to my face, and then as SOON as I leave whatever house they're at, let the crucifixtion begin. Stupid stupid people, but I guess it wouldn't be a real engagement if I actually LIKED my in laws, would it?
I feel worse and worse everyday about all of this, certainly not to the point that I'm going to hurt myself or anyone (although I did try to strangle a pillow last night...hmmm I should probably go apologize to it. Oh my God, I'm actually considering apologizing to a pillow....maybe I really am going crazy...no one asked you honey) but still.
Well, one more appointment to go and then I think I'll take good ol' reliable loving Ty to the Bark Park.
Until later I suppose
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